E.235 How Unprocessed Loss Fuels Burnout And What To Do About It

Send us a text When the lights are flashing and the clock is ticking, we train for everything—except the weight we carry home. We sit down with Coast Guard veteran and grief coach Justin Jacobs to unpack the invisible load of moral injury, the shock of losing the uniform, and the quiet ways unprocessed grief leaks into performance, relationships, and health. From the chaos of capsized boats to the stillness after a tough outcome, Justin names what many feel and few say out loud. We explore how grief hides inside anxiety, depression, and burnout, and why so many transitions—retirement, reassignment, even a “first civilian job”—feel harder than expected. Justin explains decision fatigue after service, when structure vanishes and every choice suddenly feels permanent. He offers a simple reframe: plan early, expect detours, and treat course corrections as progress, not failure. Along the way, we draw clear parallels between the Coast Guard and first responders—rapid action, limited bench strength, and constant pressure to move on to the next call. Most importantly, we get practical. Think “mental PPE”: a shared vocabulary for moral injury, short decompressions after hard calls, peer check-ins that don’t try to fix but do make space to feel. We talk about what genuinely helps the bereaved—curiosity, presence, honest permission to tell the whole truth about the person who’s gone—and what to retire forever, including hollow platitudes that minimize real pain. Justin’s own story of loss and growth brings empathy and precision to every tool he shares. If you serve, lead, or love someone who does, this conversation is a field guide for staying human under pressure and building a culture that protects people as fiercely as it protects the mission. Listen, share with your crew, and tell us what “mental PPE” looks like in your world. If this resonates, follow, rate, and review so more first responders can find it—and subscribe for more candid, actionable conversations. His Instagram is @manlygrief  His Website is: http://www.manlygrief.com  Support the show YouTube Channel For The Podcast