Empathy And The Art Of Negotiation, With Chris Voss

Today Roland talks with Chris Voss, who was formerly the FBI’s lead international kidnapping negotiator. He’s also an American businessman, author, academic, and CEO of The Black Swan Group. Roland tells the story of being on Safari, trying to close on a huge deal over a satellite phone, but with Chris Voss’s influential book on Negotiating in hand. It made all the difference.  If you’re ever making deals, negotiating, advocating for your business, clients, team, or family, this is a great episode. But even more relevant at a time like this (2020) is if you’re ever stalling, procrastinating, frozen by fear, and locked into a negative mindset; Chris also talks about the power of negotiating with yourself. “Great negotiation is about great collaboration.” Chris Voss. Listen Today For, The role of Empathy in negotiating. “Empathy is not agreement. It’s not at all. You don’t even have to like the other side to be able to exercise empathy with them.” Chris Voss. The power of a Calibrated Question. “When you say to somebody, how am I supposed to do that? And you say it, not in an accusatory way, but, you know, in a deferential way, because there’s great power in deference- it makes them look at you and see you as a human being. See your situation and rethink what they’re doing”. Chris Voss. • The neuroscientific hack that Voss uses to counteract his own overwhelm and negativity. “The identification of a negative emotion diffuses that emotion in the most effective way, not the denial of the negative emotion, but the identification of it.” Chris Voss. • How you can cultivate positivity. “If I deactivate the negative, then my positive part of my brain will kick into gear every time.” Chris Voss. • What to do when someone on the other side is ‘in NO mode,’ saying no to everything - and why are they doing that? • How to find the other party’s limits without damaging the relationship. • What you can do to influence the decision-maker when you’re working through a hostile intermediary or third party. And so much more! “Vision drives decision. Decision drives action.” Chris Voss. If you’re enjoying Business Lunch with Roland Frasier, head over to our home page and sign up for occasional memos from us. You can also follow Roland on Facebook, where his profile is always full of content and conversation. But most of all, to support the show, would you leave us a review on Apple Podcasts? We would appreciate it! Click to find us on Apple Podcasts and other podcast players. 🎧  Mentioned In This Episode The Book, Never Split the Difference. Contact & Follow Chris Voss On Twitter, His website. Contact & Follow Roland On Facebook  On Instagram  Through his Website  Follow Business Lunch Podcast On Instagram On Twitter