How to Get What You Need From the People in Charge with Melody Wilding

Do you know how to effectively communicate with someone in a higher position, such as your boss, a board, or anyone in a position of authority? Kevin welcomes Melody Wilding, who shares strategies and conversation frameworks to help professionals at all levels navigate complex relationships with their leaders. Melody and Kevin discuss the concept of “managing up”; not as sucking-up or people-pleasing, but to take ownership of your success by fostering productive and respectful relationships with those in charge. They also discuss the critical conversations outlined in her book and dive into three in particular: the boundaries conversation, the feedback conversation, and the styles conversation. Melody emphasizes the "triple win" philosophy, which focuses on finding solutions that benefit you, your boss, and the organization. She offers practical advice for leaders on how to facilitate managing up for their team members, such as asking, "What do you need from me?" Listen For 00:00 Introduction 01:23 Guest Introduction: Melody Wilding 02:16 Welcome and Opening Question 03:05 The Psychology of Managing Up 04:11 Everyone Has a Boss 05:18 The “Why Isn’t My Boss in This Class?” Problem 06:08 Managing Up Isn’t About Excusing Bad Leadership 07:11 Managing Up Is for You 08:20 The 10 Conversations Framework 09:01 Boundaries Conversation 10:28 Setting Expectations and Clarifying Priorities 12:06 Creating Win-Win Outcomes 14:20 Feedback Conversation 16:25 Building Trust Through Positive Feedback 17:27 From Labels to Behavior: The ABC Model 19:33 Constructive Proposals, Not Complaints 20:28 Styles Conversation 22:49 It’s About Them, Not You 24:54 Avoiding Labels and Confirmation Bias 26:05 Meet the Needs of Your Boss 27:09 Ethical Visibility and Remote Work 28:37 Help Your Boss Help You 29:42 Make it Easier for People to Manage Up to You 30:38 One-on-Ones as Strategic Tools 32:14 The Leadership Book Question 33:12 What Do You Do for Fun 34:23 Learn More: ManagingUp.com 35:15 Final Thoughts: What Will You Do Melody's Story: Melody Wilding is the bestselling author of Trust Yourself: Stop Overthinking and Channel Your Emotions for Success at Work and Managing Up: How to Get What You Need from the People in Charge. She is a licensed social worker with a master’s degree from Columbia University, a professor of human behavior at Hunter College in New York City, and a former emotions researcher at Rutgers University. For more than a decade, she’s helped top performers and leadership at the world’s most successful companies to communicate more clearly, prevent burnout, and transform complicated workplace dynamics into powerful alliances that impact the bottom line. Her work has been featured in The New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and The Washington Post, to name a few. She’s a regular contributor to Harvard Business Review, Forbes, Fast Company, and CNBC. https://melodywilding.com/ http://managingup.com/ https://www.instagram.com/melodywilding/ This Episode is brought to you by... Flexible Leadership is every leader’s guide to greater success in a world of increasing complexity and chaos.  Book Recommendations Managing Up: How to Get What You Need from the People in Charge by Melody Wilding  Trust Yourself: Stop Overthinking and Channel Your Emotions for Success at Work by Melody Wilding Tiny Experiments: How to Live Freely in a Goal-Obsessed World by Anne-Laure Le Cunff Flex Your Feelings: Train Your Brain to Develop the 7 Traits of Emotional Fitness by Dr. Emily Anhalt Like this? Managing Up with Mary Abbajay Trusting Yourself with Melody Wilding Join Our Community If you want to view our live podcast episodes, hear about new releases, or chat with others who enjoy this podcast join one of our communities below. Join the Facebook Group Join the LinkedIn Group   Leave a Review If you liked this conversation, we’d be thrilled if you’d let others know by leaving a review on Apple Podcasts. Here’s a quick guide for posting a review. Review on Apple: https://remarkablepodcast.com/itunes    Podcast Better! Sign up with Libsyn and get up to 2 months free! Use promo code: RLP