Episode 313-Beyond the Mask: Discovering Your Patterns of Possibility with Coach Lee Hopkins

Send us a text What if the key to meaningful connections isn"t trying harder to fit in, but learning how to authentically stand out? Coach Lee Hopkins transforms this question into life-changing guidance for late-diagnosed autistic adults struggling with social connections. Growing up watching sitcoms where problems resolved neatly in 30 minutes, Coach Lee assumed real relationships would follow the same pattern. Instead, he spent decades "destroying relationships" without understanding why. Through therapy, he discovered the foundation of connection—acknowledging that both he and others had feelings—but something was still missing. As an undiagnosed autistic person, his direct communication style clashed with neurotypical expectations, leaving him perpetually disconnected despite being surrounded by people. Sarah Brafford shares similar experiences of feeling "like a unicorn in the horse and cow pasture," visible but fundamentally different. Both describe the exhaustion of masking—that survival strategy of nodding, smiling, and suppressing authentic responses to appear "normal." When they finally attempted to unmask, rejection often followed, creating a painful cycle that kept them isolated. The conversation takes a powerful turn as Coach Lee reveals his transformative insight: "Rejection is redirection." Through his coaching practice, Patterns of Possibility, he guides clients to identify their values and seek connections in aligned environments. Rather than forcing yourself into spaces that require masking, he suggests finding communities where your authentic self naturally fits. The path requires vulnerability—something he teaches through practical, actionable steps rather than vague encouragements to "just be yourself." Whether you"re autistic, neurodivergent, or simply feeling disconnected, this episode offers hope through personal stories of finding genuine connection. Learn how small acts of recognition—like thanking the often-overlooked workers in our daily lives—can create ripples of positive change while building your connection muscles. Ready to move from merely being invited to truly belonging? Visit PatternsOfPossibility.com for free resources, including a 7-minute guide on "How to be vulnerable without being overexposed" and information about joining the Trust and Thrive Tribe community. Support the show