270: Burnout, Resentment and Boundaries with Cait Donovan

Today’s guest is Cait Donovan. Cait Donovan is a Keynote speaker, one of New York City's leading burnout experts, host of “Fried – The Burnout Podcast,” author of the book "The Bouncebackability Factor", and an acupuncturist with a master's degree in Chinese medicine.  This was a great conversation about burnout, resentment, and boundaries. We discussed: Feeling not good enough. 2:00 The biggest component of burnout is feelings of not being enough. What does burnout mean to you? 4:18 Burnout is when the pilot light in the body goes too low and there is not enough energy to sustain normal functioning, rejuvenation, etc. The feeling of not being enough is part of burnout, and being too much is also part of it. The difference between burnout and stress. 9:21 Stress and burnout are a continuum. Burnout is the far end of chronic unmitigated stress, while stress is healthy and good when it is not chronic. Resentment is the number one tool for keeping yourself out of burnout. It is one of the main tools that she teaches people. More on resentment If you pay close attention to resentments objectively, you will notice that each and every zone of your life where your boundaries are being crossed. Boundaries make you more generous and more forgiving. 17:00 When boundaries are in place, the places that you enjoy being generous are available to you and you can use them. What does it mean to honor your calendar? 19:03 The importance of honoring appointments and paying yourself back What resentment feels like to Cait How to set boundaries when you feel resentment. 20:48 When she feels resentful, it is because she is over giving and feeling like she is doing the same thing. When there is a mismatch in a relationship and resentment is building up, ask yourself a few questions to sort through what is really going on. For some of us and even relationships, we bounce before sending a boundary because we are afraid of setting a boundary. How to avoid burnout? 26:04 Finding the balance between bringing resources in and only releasing the resources that are available. If one does not learn in one area of their life, they can leave whatever relationship or job they want and take it with them to another place. What is the first step to identifying your resentments? 28:26 Identifying resentments is one of the first steps when people come to work with you, because they are the signposts.   Here’s a link to Cait’s mini-course on resentments!  https://www.caitdonovan.com/store      Resources Mentioned: Sign up for the Webinar here: August 21st, 4PM Eastern: https://us02web.zoom.us/webinar/register/WN_Yg17bBbCQEeBIz_Y8x4Z3Q August 29th, 12PM Eastern: https://us02web.zoom.us/webinar/register/WN_sUrUAn_0SNyNivUFOg9I5w   Join the Advocate with Elegance membership!   Stay Connected with Heather: To schedule a call with Heather, click here  To follow Heather on Instagram, click here To subscribe to Heather’s newsletter, click here To request a transcript of this episode, email: operations@heatherhansenpresents.com     ____________ Disclaimer: The Elegant Warrior Podcast is presented solely for educational and entertainment purposes. It is not a substitute for the advice of a physician, a lawyer, a professional coach, a therapist or other qualified professionals.