207. Building Meaningful Friendships: Overcoming Loneliness and Finding Joy with Ziem Nguyen Neubert

Ziem Nguyen Neubert, Executive Director of Project Cornerstone at the YMCA of Silicon Valley, joins us to discuss the topic of loneliness. Ziem leads an amazing team, working with school and community partners to support youth social and emotional well-being. Over 20 years of experience in education – serving as a teacher, coordinator, assistant principal, and principal – has been instrumental in supporting her work in building relationships and driving the vision for Project Cornerstone. Ziem is passionate about fostering positive skills, relationships, experiences, and honest conversations to create safe, caring, and equitable communities in Silicon Valley and beyond. Today, Project Cornerstone works with over 180 schools, reaching 62,000 students annually with the help of over 4,000 volunteers. Topics Covered:     Loneliness defined Social media connectedness and loneliness Misconceptions around loneliness Friendships and different kinds of connections 3 ways we take care of ourselves: assess, plan, act   3     Episode Takeaways   1.   We may not want to get rid of loneliness – if we never experience sadness how will we experience joy? It’s also a way to kick ourselves into gear and take some action when we notice it. It’s chronic loneliness we need to watch for.   2.   Social media isn’t all bad but may not be as meaningful to us as a way to connect with others. It’s the choices we make. While the social tools can assist us in connecting and be convenient/fast, we have the choice to connect this way or pick up the phone or make a plan to visit someone. 3.   There are a number of misconceptions around loneliness: like quantity matters, to feel lonely isn’t normal, we should feel shameful if we get lonely, loneliness only happens to “old” people, and introverts are lonelier than extroverts (we all need along alone time to recharge). Friendship is a key way to address loneliness but it’s good to assess, plan, and take action when choosing friends.   Ziem’s Resources The BIG document – report: “Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation – The U.S. Surgeon General’s Advisory on the Healing Effects of Social Connection and Community”       https://www.hhs.gov/sites/default/files/surgeon-general-social-connection-advisory.pdf   “US surgeon general Vivek Murthy: ‘Loneliness is like hunger, a signal we’re lacking something for survival’” (January 29, 2024) https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2024/jan/29/us-surgeon-general-vivek-murthy-loneliness-mental-health-epidemic-social-media   “New Surgeon General Advisory Raises Alarm about the Devastating Impact of the Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation in the United States” (May 3, 2023)      https://www.hhs.gov/about/news/2023/05/03/new-surgeon-general-advisory-raises-alarm-about-devastating-impact-epidemic-loneliness-isolation-united-states.html “Loneliness Among Teens Has Increased Over the Years Violence, depression, and radicalization realities are telling.” (May 30, 2022)    https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/cultural-neuroscience/202205/loneliness-among-teens-has-increased-over-the-years   Card or Gift Items Ziem Liked from Our Store https://girltaketheleadpod.com/shop       Lotus Heart with the sentiment: “I carry your heart with me – I carry it in my heart”  e.e. cummings.     How to reach Ziem:   LinkedIn account: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ziem-neubert/ eMail: ziem@projectcornerstone.org Website: www.projectcornerstone.org You can make a donation there. Click on ‘Community’ for access to a number of resources. Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/projectcornerstone Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/projcornerstone/   How to reach Yo Canny:    Our website: www.girltaketheleadpod.com  You can send a message or voicemail there. We’d love to hear from you!   email: yo@yocanny.com   FB group: Girl, Take the Lead https://www.facebook.com/groups/272025931481748/?ref=share   IG: yocanny YouTube   LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/yocanny/